First of all, I want to thank you for wonderful work you have been doing. I have immensely benefited from it. Thank you.
My question is surrounding mind momentum. For most of my adult life, I have lived in my head and trying to attain peace. Since coming across your web site, I can say, consciously, I have lost all desire to clean/perfect my mind any more. I understand this at intellectual level.
But the undercurrent of anxiety, resistance and heavy analyzing has not stopped. And I would be ok with it, except it brings lots of pain and suffering. That leads to argument and war in my head. Constant attempt to fix it. That leads to more analyzing and "trying" to fix and even "letting go" fixing. Letting go has become another thing for me to attain, even though I know, it cannot be done consciously. That these thoughts, resistance, inner war, happens to me and not something I do.
But they are debilitating and at certain level, I want to be more at ease and peace. Any pointers?
Become bored of all of it. If you see that the war and the suffering inside is inevitable and unfixable, then perhaps you will naturally lose interest. Interest in how it all is, whether it is there or not, why it is there, what it is saying etc. all keeps a steady support of energy flowing to the same movements.
It is not "normal", since from early we are taught to be good fixers, to jump on things and make them as we want them to be. But how long can you wrestle for? Perhaps you are not tired of it yet? Perhaps you still want to conquer it or overcome it in some way? If this is the attitude, it will be a battle. If you become weak enough that you can not personally manage every thought or discomfort you have, then a greater power can take the burden. But don't wait for that to happen.
Often we want the discomfort to go, so that we can relax and be at peace. Is it possible to not demand pleasure and peace at this moment? If you stop demanding it, stop looking for it, stop waiting for it to appear, stop waiting for something else to disappear, then what is left of you?
Comments for Mind Momentum Never Stops
(from previous website)
Jul 22, 2015
I agree with you. Part of me wants to fight forever. To not give up, to be at peace. It is like splitting into logic and emotions. Logic understands what you are saying, but emotions continue to flow. even giving up, becomes a technique to attain peace. Hope I am able to explain.