How Can I Feel Again?

by Gabriel
(São Paulo, Brazil)

Question:

Hello. I have difficulty experiencing my emotions or to feel anything inside me. Normally, when a person starts to entertain thoughts of anger, he/she will eventually experience this in the body as a emotion. For me this doens't seem to happen. I still get angry/violent thoughts, but there's no register of this in the body. Nor do i get sad/despressed nor have motivation to accomplish things.

Without feeling/emotions and lack of imagination/vision it is very clear that I will not get far in life.

I've been practicing inner body meditation for a while now. I notice that sometimes "an energy movement" occurs in my chest (a warm sensation that arises and then vanishes). Is this a sign that the practice is working? 

Also how important is intensity in this? You mentioned here that one should focus on a body part and maintain attention there, and in time one would be able to feel more of this in the rest of the body. Should i focus solely on the parts that i feel the warm sensation the most (hands/head/and sometimes feet) or try to feel parts where this sensation is not prevalent?

Response:

I might suggest to stop trying so hard. 

I don't know. Just relax. The intention of improving or getting better at any kind of meditation will lead you down a painful road of struggling to be somewhere else. Just feel whatever you can feel and leave it at that. You may feel more over time, but it is not so important how "good" you become at it.

There is no need to compare yourself to others in terms of how able you are to feel emotions and sensations.

You will find it easier for the attention to rest more deeply in the body when you are not trying to achieve or get better at something, especially any kind of meditation. It is enough as it is.

I'm not sure if this answer will be satisfactory for you, but thanks for getting in touch.

Adam