Since many human interactions are mind-dominated, we are conditioned to believe that interactions (unless they are with close friends or family members) must be full of speech and mental interaction.
The voice in the head, which many can identify with, is not who you are. When it is believed to be the truth of what one is, then the voice in the head just talks to itself, between two people. There is then no space in interaction, no silence, no rest, and instead the flow of mental content takes the stage.
It can seem very difficult, since society abhors silence – but know that you don’t have to fill any silence if you don’t feel to. You can just keep quiet in your own being. The best words arise from here anyway.
Don't Force Or Expect Anything
Silence isn’t asking to be filled or even maintained. Let it be. You need not be an entertainer or anyone at all. This is being yourself – when you stop trying to be someone in particular, and stop trying to act a certain way.
You need not force silence, since sometimes conversation can be very enjoyable and natural, but to feel as if you simply must speak no matter what – is the cause of much anxiety, and frankly, useless conversations.
Being "Somebody" Only Clogs Things Up
There will likely be a huge tendency to “be someone”, literally as if you can feel “someone” rising up inside to take center stage when in the company of others. Watch this happen. Even if speaking happens, just watch. You do not owe it to anyone else to occupy their mind, prevent their boredom, or remove their discomfort in the face of emptiness. No one owes anyone else anything. People must look after their own inner state.
Cast off any fear of being “boring” or “nobody”. These are just the mind’s tricks. You may have noticed that people who are completely taken over by the ego’s need to please people, to make conversation, or to fill silence, are not particularly pleasant to be around. They can even emit a kind of weakness.
You need not be closed to anyone, or expect any silence. Be totally open, empty. Even if something is shaking or feels weak inside the body, stay as you are, don’t judge anything, including feelings or emotions. Allow.
Then everything is more natural. Speech is spontaneous, arising from nothing and returning to nothing. You need not do anything. Action happens, or it doesn’t. All takes care of itself. Contrary to the predictions of your mind, some may appreciate this inner state, since it relieves their own expectations to “be someone”. Some may hate it, but you can’t please everyone.
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