Questions and Answers for Inner Peace...
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During a recent group zoom call for inner peace, someone asked about dealing with a sense of dissatisfaction they were feeling in their life. Hopefully this simple approach can help in dealing with dissatisfaction and finding happiness…
During recent group Zoom meetings I have been asked if the desire for happiness or the desire to feel good implies resistance against negativity within ourselves.
"If I want to be happy, does that mean I am in resistance to unhappiness?"
I would say not necessarily. Happiness is a natural preference, in the same way that pleasant food is preferred over garbage. Once the fight against unhappiness or negativity starts to come to an end, there gradually becomes more space for us to choose a way to feel, if we want to do such a thing…
If we are actually choosing to feel good or happy instead of feeling negative in any way, are we not resisting the negativity in order to feel better? Is there not some kind of conflict within us if we want or choose to feel happy?
During a recent group Zoom meeting for inner peace, someone began asking about how to move out of negative self-stories. This led to a response about the mind ultimately seeking some sense of existence or security, and how this sense of security could be accessed directly in a much more enjoyable way. Then there is a segment about inner peace - how you can treat it as an infinite and abundant energy that is constantly around you and flowing through you, and you are either noticing it, or not...
Is reluctance to do some activity a signal from my inner being?
I have lots of moments of deep reluctance to do some activity. Take, for example, my blog writing. Or housework. Or exercise. At other times, there seems to be a willingness to do the same things. So I feel it's not the activity per se I am not ready to do. But I can't understand why I have these times of deep reluctance.
Hello everyone,
Someone suggested I share some examples of questions I answer during one-to-one sessions. My responses always reflect whoever I am talking to. Someone might be very into "spiritual" topics already, while someone else might just want a way to feel more free. Here is an example of someone who was already following a particular practice who wanted help. I hope it's useful...
Someone asked me a question recently about the habit of worrying abut loved ones - knowing logically that they are fine but having uncontrollable negative thoughts of worrying about their safety…
Does the law of attraction really fit in with losing or disidentifying from the ego? How can the two come together in everyday life?
Hopefully this article can shed some light…
I have one more, unrelated, question for you that has to do with regrets and making the same mistake over and over. Specifically, I am making the mistake of getting together with my ex even though I know he does not want anything serious. Even though every time I see him it hurts after, I never seem to think about it in the moment…
Hi Adam!
Can you do a post on insecurity? I am a female and constantly bombarded with pictures of models on social media and feel so worthless after. Even if I have a confident moment, it all goes downhill when I see someone my mind thinks looks better and it’s really hard to pull out of it when that happens.
Thank you!
I have been following your newsletter for a long time and I really like your work,
I need actually help on dealing with my mental health, I need help on dealing with stress, anxiety and Bulimia.
I wanted to let you know how much your Pain Body letter helped me, I reread it often and have forwarded it to friends. Are there any other things I can be doing to help myself not worry so much about my husband finding a job?
How do you really forgive a parent who acted like your own worst enemy? How do you really ever forgive that? Or move on from that?
I recently spent some time with my husband's family to attend a family event. I had some difficulty with one of his close family members. During our time together she kept me out of the conversation as if I was invisible, she never looked in my direction to totally ignored me.
How do I avoid feeling rejected and emotionally depleted in her company?
“My question is, I have overcome a lot from addiction, anxiety, self esteem and I owe it all to Buddhism and my practice of almost three years. As I approach my 3rd soberthday. I kind of feel like I read too many Buddhist books and that though I have come so far, I really haven't gotten anywhere, is that weird? In the midst of feeling so much better and waking up a little. I wonder if I've gotten anywhere at all. Your thoughts, please and thank you.”
"Hey Adam, I am more aware of my own body than I ever was before. However, it somehow scares me. I discover unpleasantness that I did not even know existed. For example, as I come to the present, I feel pain and I hear this noise in my head (a tinnitus) ... It almost feels as if I am creating all this myself, maybe by becoming aware but being scared/resistant to what is. Is that possible? I am somehow disappointed in myself when I realise that I am not accepting the unpleasant sensations..."
Hi Adam,
Love your site and your blog very much.
I want to ask you a question. I have been meditating for 35 years now so I am able to "stand apart" and watch my thoughts and feelings happen without attaching the self to them. I just feel them without resistance and let them pass. My doubt is about what happens after that.
A question was recently asked about how to deal with negative people that you might meet on social occasions. My response is below, I hope it serves you well...
A recent question was asked about how to flow more easily in life. The specifics of the question were left out, so that it could appeal to more people...
A recent question was asked about dealing with someone who always expects you to do things for them with nothing in return. I hope my response is useful for anyone else dealing with a similar thing. How to deal with negative family members is easiest when...
Hi Adam,
I'm having a hard time distinguishing refocusing from escaping. My thoughts will whirr and whirr - like a cyclone. I understand I need to let them be, but should I refocus on the breath?
Or would this be escaping?
If there is a toxic energy in a human being, we call them a toxic person. But see it as energetic, not as a personal thing.
An energy lives inside them and breathes out garbage, and we think it is the fault of the shell.
Well, what is a negative body image? A thought. It is not your body, it is a thought ABOUT the body that is believed, perhaps supported by other humans and then regarded as real.
It is likely that if you had not grown up in this particular society, you would not have any kind of negative body image in your mind. It is a kind of programming, a kind of conditioning to judge certain shapes as bad and others as good.
Hi Adam,
Love your books and online meditations. They have helped me accept the anxiety or "feeling" as I now call it as its easier to accept that way.
One question I have and I think I already know the answer is. I am in a job I dislike, the job itself is fine but it's a desk job and feels wrong to be sitting at a desk for 7 hours a day. I have tried to accept it but find it difficult. Is the next step to accept the resistance to the job?
"Hi Adam, what do you think is the best method to let go of a troubled past? In particular, how do you let go of what people who have seen you act in a certain way think of you?"
Q: "Hello Adam, thank you for a wonderful website. I have always been a person who gets attached to people easily. I then tend to focus more on them than myself. This has made me a very anxious person. What are your thoughts on attachment and how can I focus on my life more then others? Thanks for your help."
"Hi Adam, how can one stop thoughts and feelings of jealousy? I dont want to feel jealousy but even if I tell myself I will not be jealous I cant stop the thoughts. I feel it more when I sense someone close to me might leave me. Thanks for your help..."
Let yourself feel judged in the worst or most humiliating way possible. Don’t resist it. If you invite all of this, if you imagine the family judging you in some negative way, and you don’t fight against it, then what happens? What happens to you?
There is a voice in the head which speaks, which goes over all of this again and again and gets nowhere, and you think that the voice is who you are. But you can hear the voice. Just hear the voice, that’s all you have to do. You don’t need to judge it or try to break away from it. Just hear it if it speaks...
Home > Inner Peace Topics > Inner Peace Q & A
Forgiveness can be made easier through asking yourself the question:
"If I was able to forgive or let go of this - then how would I feel?"
If you ask the question and feel for the response, and repeat this inner experiment, eventually you might reach a point where you are experiencing the freedom of forgiveness, without ever making the step to forgive and let go.
I hope this video helps in making forgiveness easier, which was taken from a one-to-one session with me.